Madness, Insanity, and Out of Control
by Bite Sized
Summary: Its a hot summer. Nothing to do but act immature. What mayham will the boys cause is totally unexpected. Chapter 8 is up!
1. Plans and Baka's

Yay! It's about time I got a new fan fic up.. sorry it took me so long. Been busy. That and I have been changing all my script format fic's to story format so my lovely readers can read them. OK well hope you like it.

**Warning:** Spur of the moment idea while having a water fight so it may be a bit insane. You have been warned.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Gundam Wing. Wish I did though. Oh well.

Madness, Insanity, & Out of Control

by Bite Sized

Chapter 1 - Plans and Baka's

It was a dark and stormy night. . . well OK no it wasn't. It was more like a boiling hot day with no clouds in the sky. We find the Gundam Pilots hiding in the basement of the safe house. Duo and Trowa are playing a computer game, Heero is busy on his laptop doing something cough looking at porn sites cough , Wufei is attempting to meditate, and Quatre is practicing his violin.

"I'm sooo bored!" Duo moaned after beating Trowa yet again. "Why does it have to be so damn hot?!"

"Baka! Shut the hell up! I'm meditating over here." Wufei angrily cried out.

"Aww I'm sorry Wuffers." Duo said sympathetically causing Wufei to turn a lovely shade of red a strawberry would be jealous of.

"Don't ever call me Wuffers again! Unless you really don't want your braid anymore."

Duo grabbed his braid defensively. "You wouldn't!"

Wufei donned a evil grin. "You want to bet?"

Quatre looked up from his violin as he put it down. Heero kept typing and Trowa beat Duo while he was distracted. "Oh no, here we go again. Heero can you make them Shut up please. Just listening to these two is making me feel hot."

"Hn. Duo you stupid baka, shut the heck up. Wufei don't cut Duo's braid." Heero said without even looking up from his screen. Wufei and Duo Shut up immediately but started a staring contest in protest to not being able to talk.

"Quatre I think you're right. it is getting hot in here. (It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes...) Anyone want anything to drink?" Trowa said getting up from his chair and moving towards the door.

"I do. I'll come with you. Anyone else?" Quatre piped up, moving for the door.

"Ice water would be nice." Heero said finally looking up from his screen.

"Okay. What about you two?" Quatre asked Wufei and Duo but they were to busy trying to stare the other down.

"I think that's a no." Heero said observing the two.

"OK, We'll be back soon." Quatre says as he leaves the room with Trowa leading the way. Heero Turns back to his laptop ignoring the quibbling young "gentlemen".

------

"I think those two need to cool down." Trowa says to Quatre

"We all need to cool down." Quatre replies as the enter the kitchen. Trowa headed over to the cupboard to get glasses while Quatre went over to the refrigerator, pulling out cold water. "Too bad there's no way to cool down. Oh wait! Yes there is!"

"What?" Trowa exclaimed in disbelief

"All we have to do is. . .

"Haven't you two calmed down yet?" Heero asked after dodging a flying pillow, thrown by a careless and very babyish Duo. Only after 5 minuets the two fighting boys had started a pillow fight still keeping their staring contest going.

"No! He started it!" Wufei and Duo angrily spat out.

"You're both immature?"

"Yes I am." Duo answered with proudness and satisfaction.

Wufei's eyes widened in horror. "I'm acting like Duo!"

Wufei ran away screaming from the room to lock himself in his room. Duo watched as he ran away and proudly put a smile on his face. "Yay! I won the staring contest. Wait did he just insult me?"

Heero looked at Duo with the I-can't-belive-you're-so-dumb expression on his face. Very sarcastically he answered Duo's idiotic question. "No Duo, he didn't."

"Oh. OK!" Duo chirped happily

Turning back to the computer, Duo opens his e-mail. Quickly typing a new message and sending it. Two minuets later a "You've got mail." is heard from Heero's computer. Heero looks over at Duo, who is once again playing a game. Cautiously Heero opens the e-mail.

"DUO!" Heero yells looking over at Duo with his famous death glare.

Innocently Duo replies. "Yes Heero?"

"Omeo karosue!"

"Eep!" Duo squeals before running out the room heading for his room. Heero throws down his laptop and runs after his prey. Shouts of promises of pain are heard.

The e-mail message: Hiya Heero. Guess what. I'm bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored. Did I mention I'm bored? Want to do something other then look at porn?

Bite Sized: Hee hee hee I'm going to be evil and stop it here. Hmmm wonder what Quatre thought of. I know and you don't! R&R and tell me what yea think. By all means flame if you want to. - Annoying yet again


	2. Till Death Drowns Us

Wow! I didn't think that you would think it was this good. Thanks guys! I love my readers.. I'm just telling you now, I may not post every day. It will probably be every few days. But keep reading guys. Special thanks to kidishcaresh, ZmajGoddess, Melanie, dragonmaster,IrishKitsune and Miakakilala for reviewing. OK on with the second chapter!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Wing.... how many times must we say this?

Madness, Insanity, & Out of Control

by Bite Sized

Chapter 2 - Till Death Drowns Us

"Duo! You have five seconds to come out and face your punishment or else I will come in there and make you permanently unable to move!" Heero's angry voice carried through the locked door. Moving quickly, Duo ran over to the side of his bed and shoved it against the door.

"One!" Heero was beginning to pick the lock. It wouldn't take more then two seconds for him to get it picked. "Two!"

Scampering quickly and quietly to the window, Duo slid it open and climbed out. Shutting the window tight again, right after starting pushing a button on the tape player.

"Heh, that will slow Heero down and buy me some time to get to the safe point." Duo thought running off to the garage. "I think maybe two hours should be enough to allow for Heero to calm down enough."

"Hey Heero, we heard shouts of promises of pain and we were wondering if you could... What's that sound?" Quatre asked as he and Trowa ran up to the wide eyed Heero. "Is that... what I think it is?"

"Yes, but Noin isn't here... it's a tape." Heero replied.

"Ack! My virgin ears, my virgin ears! Ahhhh!" Quatre screamed completely missing the "it's a tape" part. Backing up quickly, Quatre tripped over Trowa and fell down the nearby stairs.

"Your water's downstairs in the kitchen." Trowa said calmly. "If you hurry you can beat Duo to the hiding spot."

"Right." Heero said running down the stairs stepping over the hysterical Quatre. Grabbing his glass of water before heading towards the hidden door that led to the gundam garage.

"Got to hurry. Heero will be looking in here soon." Duo mumbled to himself as he headed towards Heero's gundam. Hurriedly climbing up to the cockpit, Duo entered it and sat down in the chair breathing heavily. "Heero will never find me here."

A wet hand clasped over Duo's mouth.

"Quatre, shut the fuck up already! It was just a tape! You sound like an onna." Wufei retorted at the whimpering Quatre. Trowa was busy applying rubbing alcohol on the few scrapes Quatre had gotten when he fell down the stairs. "Trowa you got to make him shut up."

"Why don't you go to a different room then?" Trowa said accidentally pushing a little to hard on a particularly nasty cut.

"Maybe I will." Wufei mocked as he walked towards the door. "I will be in my room."

"Trowa," Quatre whined. "That hurt."

"Oh shut up."

"I think we should put our plan in action. Do you have the supplies?" Quatre asked

"Ya. There in my room. I'll go get them now." Trowa said getting up from his spot next to Quatre.

"OK. I'll meet you by the spare bedroom on floor four." Quatre yelled out the room door as Trowa left.

"Hold it. Did you really think you could escape me?" The mysterious voice moaned out softly to the struggling Duo.

"Damn it! Let me go!" Duo screamed biting the hand covering his mouth. Getting up from the chair he turned around and faced his attacker. "Heero!"

Moving slowing around the chair towards Duo, Heero stepped towards the shaking boy as he growled. "Duo you bastard. Tell anyone my secret and you will be in lots of pain." Pulling out his hidden gun he aimed took aim. "Now come out of _ my _gundam and come back to the mansion with me."

Duo slunked out of the gundam closely followed by Heero, still holding the gun. Arriving at the front door, Heero opened it for Duo to go in only to have a little surprise. Water came down everywhere, as the water balloons holding the water captive broke, soaking the two surprised boys.

AN: Well there you go. I finally got this chapter up. Hopefully my writers block clears up soon and I can get the next chapter up soon. Keep R&R. -hyper angels


	3. Shocking Isn't It?

Well I guess its been too long... but good news is my writers block has finally broke! 'stupid muses.....' Anyway after the long vacation they went on to Japan they have returned and are ready to work! So lets get on with the story and sorry for taking forever to update. Oh yes hope you like Relena bashing.

Disclaimer: I asked for Gundam Wing for Christmas but no I don't own Gundam Wing.

Madness, Insanity, and Out of Control

Chapter 3- Shocking Isn't It?

Sitting wrapped in about a million towels Duo and Heero sat complaining and, dare I say, plotting.

"Hhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooo!!! Where are you?" A loud high pitched mirror breaking voice screamed out. The Terrible Relena was there. Poking around the door, Relena spotted Heero amongst the many towels he was trying to hide under. "Oh there you are Heero. Would you like to go to the beach with me?"

"No. Go away and leave me alone! I have a girlfriend for goodness sakes. Go to the beach with Duo or Quatre or anyone but me!" Heero cried out surprising both Relena and Duo.

"You have a what?!" Duo cried out. "When did this happen? Who is she?"

"You're just kidding aren't you Heero. Aren't you?" Relena asked nervously.

"No I'm not joking. Get the hell out of here. I never want to see your face again unless it's dead with a bullet I shot through it!" Heero said emotionlessly going into Zero System mode. Relena backed up slowly. Nearing the door she tripped and Heero pulled out his gun and shot just inches above where she last had been. Screaming Relena ran out the door and down the driveway.

"He-Heero... You're scaring me. Pu-put that away will ya?" Duo stammered. Now very, very scared for his life and the sanity of his friend.

"What was Heero shooting at this time?" Quatre, Trowa, and Wufie ran into the room. Looking at the whimpering Duo and the obviously insane Heero. Putting two and two together, the three boys tackled Heero down and took away his gun. Tyeing him tightly to a chair so he could cause no bodily harm, the boys began to interrogate Duo.

"He just went berserk on Relena (Who can blame him??) and he said he had a girlfriend." Being very stunned and half in shock the words were barely audible. Twitching slightly Trowa lead Duo to his room to lie down. Upon returning, the living room looked like it was hit by a tornado. Over turned furniture, ripped pillows, feathers everywhere. No Heero or Pilots to be found. Looking out the door he could see the other two boys chasing after a deranged Heero heading off in the Beach direction.

Looking around the room again Trowa sighed and began straighting out the room. "It's about time he cracked. Being driven insane and this unbearable heat. I only wish I knew who would be next to crack."

Meanwhile, Wufie and Quatre had finally manged to catch up with the insane boy and were trying desperately to stop him. Having no such luck, Heero found Relena within two minutes of arriving at the beach.

Dun Dun Dun!

Yes I know it's short. My mind has decided to go back to being on Writer Block mode. I'll make it up to you though. Anyway R&R. See you!


	4. Not Insane, Only Emotional

A/N: Yay! My muses have returned and I am currently fighting to stop reading Harry Potter fanfiction. Thank-you for the reviews. They have been a big help getting me off my butt and start writing. Anyway enough blabber!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. . . there I said it.

Madness, Insanity, and Out Of Control

Chapter 4: Not Insane, Only Emotional

* * *

Sitting in the kitchen early in the afternoon, eating chicken noodle soup and listening to the radio, the gundam boys were silently sending Heero awkward looks. Ignoring the others, Heero smirked as the radio relapsed what had happened at a certain beach near by.

". . . mass chaos in sued. Seven people are in hospital for minor injuries. Only Miss Relena was severely hurt with both legs broken and many bruises. Witnesses say Heero Yuy was the cause of the disaster and has finally cracked. . ."

"Best time I ever had." Heero proclaimed happily. The others just shuddered.

"Heero, we were thinking last night about what happened and your well being and we decided," Quatre stated with a very scared tone, "that we are all going to pitch in and get you some mental help. It does work wonders you know."

"I'm not insane. Yesterday was just my way of keeping the bitch away."

"Heero please try to see it our way. You managed to scare Duo yesterday. That and you almost killed Relena. You just can't go around out of your right mind, try to kill Relena and then say your fine. I mean-"

"Thank-you Quatre, thats quite enough." Duo said taping his mouth shut. That done he got up and punched Heero in the stomach, causing the wind to be knocked out of him. "That's pay-back. You're going like it or not."

"I refuse!" Heero cried just before falling unconscious.

Several hours later Heero awoke to find himself restrained in a straight jacket and being held in a room with padded walls. Muttering curses Heero attempted to free himself.

"Oh so you're awake now. I wouldn't try to escape if I were you. Your friend with the braid has your laptop." A mysterious voice said from somewhere in the room.

"Let me out of here! I am not insane! I was perfectly in my right mind when I tried to hurt Relena!" Heero angrily shot out. "And Duo! You had better not touch anything on my laptop or you will be sorry!"

"I'm sorry sir, (sir?) but I was specifically told not to let you go until we can come to a solution to your problem. Your friends and a professional hypnotist will be down in a few moments." The voice coolly responded to the obviously out-of-his-right-mind Heero. A few moments later the hidden door opened and his friends entered warily. Heero was not in a good mood.

"Uh, hi Heero." Trowa timidly said getting himself a famous Heero death glare.

"Right, well then, let us begin. Could you four go hold Heero still for me so I can hypnotize him? Thank-you. Now Heero please count down from 10." The Hypnotist really had no clue who he was dealing with.

"Like Bloody Hell I will! I'm fine! Dammit! I'm not insane in the least, I'm just slightly emotional. Now leave me be!" Heero cried trying to shake his so-called friends off of him. The Hypnotist sighed.

"Looks like we'll have to do this the hard way." And with that said he hit Heero right above his ear and Heero fell unconscious. "There. Now Heero you will not try to hurt anyone ever again unless you are threatened. When I count to 3 you will wake up and you will never remember what happened yesterday. 1, 2, 3." Heero woke up with a start and began wondering where he was.

"That was the hard way?" Duo asked. "Gee, even I could have done that."

"Duo shut up." Wufie shot at the braided baka.

"You shut up!" Duo yelled starting another starting contest with Wufie.

"You two are so immature." Trowa shot at the two silently bickering boys.

"Welcome back Heero." Quatre said ignoring the other three.

"I went somewhere?" Heero asked baffled. "And where are we? Why am I wearing a straight jacket? Are those two at it again?"

"I'll explain later Heero, first let's go home before those two destroy the mental hospital."

Grabbing Duo and Wufie who had just started a cat fight, Trowa, Heero, and Quatre thanked the hypnotist and left. When they arrived back at the house a message was left on the answering machine.

"Hello Mr. Yuy, this is Miss Relena's lawyer. I am phoning to tell you that Miss Relena is taking what you did to court which will be held on the 25th of August. I have sent a letter explaining the details. Have a good day."

"What did I do? Why is Relena suing me?" Heero asked. His friends coward and slowly backed away. Heero stared at his friends curiously as they found the door and ran for their rooms locking the door.

* * *

Oh poor, poor Heero. Court and he doesn't remember what he did. And what about his girlfriend. Who is she? Entertaining thought isn't it? Well I have no idea what I will do for the next chapter. Maybe I will throw in a Truth or Dare just to add to the Insanity. Well anyway tell me what you think. 


	5. Prank Day

A/N: Well thank you all for your reviews. Of course I went easy on Relena this time around but I won't next time around **hint hint. **Just to let you know my evil plots for this story are beginning to grow thin so I need you, my lovely reviewers and readers to tell me what you want seen within here. As well if you're worried about there being no plot there really is one... its just hidden. If this chapter doesn't make sense then tell me and I will redo it. Anyway on with the chappy! (P.S. Sorry it took me so long to update.)

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing.

Madness, Insanity, and Out of Control  
Chapter 5 – Prank Day

* * *

Arriving back at the safe house, the boys split up and went as far away from each other as humanly possible. Duo was locked in his room with his stereo cranked and was writing in a small flame coloured book with the title _Duo's Evil Pranks_. Quatre sat reading a novel while listening to Trowa play the flute in the living room. Wufie was (surprise, surprise) playing with his many katana. And dear sweet Heero was reading his one hundred new e-mails, most of which were either spam or uh . . . subscriptions, all that is except one from Dr. J. Quickly deleting the spam, Heero then proceeded to read the message from Dr. J informing him of their next assignment.

Ten minuets later found Heero, Trowa, Quatre, and Wufie leaving the house with twenty bags of equipment. All of them found time to tell Duo in their own way to leave the house standing in one piece till they get back. Duo being Duo had his fingers crossed behind his back.

Pulling out his wondrous book of evil pranks, Duo was underway for the return of the others the following day. While setting up his prank on Heero, Duo, narrowly avoided losing a leg. Slowly but surely the pranks were set up and the cunning boy waited patently for the following day.

Mid-afternoon the following day the boys arrived home expecting the house to not be there anymore or having to bail Duo out of jail. Of course the house is in tact but something just didn't seem right. The boys shuddered at the calmness of the house.

"Duo. We're home. You here?" Quatre yelled into the stillness. At the summoning by Quatre, Duo came around the corner with a small smile on his face. The boys grew very worried.

"Welcome home. I was just making lunch. Anyone want anything?" Duo offered, while taking some of the bags that were handed to him.

"Yes, sure. Food..." Heero replied in an exhausted voice. Wufie stared at Heero like he was crazy for accepting food from Duo.

"I'm going to my room." Wufie proclaimed as he lugged some of the bags to his room and disappeared. The others followed suit and left for their own rooms. While Duo slunked quietly out of the house and disappeared.

Heero's P.O.V.

Slowly opening several locks and shuting off about five alarm systems Heero entered his room to see his room covered in bright pink streamers, posters with pictures of Relena, banners with "Heero loves Relena" all over the place. Heero fell over in shock and overwhelming amount of pink in his face.

Quatre's P.O.V.

Walked into his room, oblivious to the redecorating that had happened, and went straight over to his answering machine to see 39 messages awaiting him. Pressing the play button Quatre finally looked up and saw the horror awaiting him, followed by the yelling message left by one of his sisters. "Quatre! How could you! Did you think we would not find out how you've been spending some of your money? For goodness sakes Quatre, I thought we raised you better then that! Looking at that sort of stuff. That's it, I'm coming over there to visit, actually we're all going to come. See you soon Quatre. You had better have a good explanation for this. See you on Sunday. Good-bye."

Quatre was staring at horror at what his sister had just said and stared at the new posters decorating his room. Falling unconscious while trying to figure what he would tell his sisters, the answering machine kept playing angry, crying sister messages.

Trowa's P.O.V.

Trowa entered his room fully expecting some sort of food item to come flying at him, but instead as soon as the door was opened, a loud explosive alarm went off. . . well actually more like the twelve most annoying alarm system alarms were blaring at full volume all around the room with no visible means of turning it off. Trowa was blown over by the sound of it.

Wufie's P.O.V.

Dumping his stuff on his bed, Wufie walked over to a cabinet on the wall holding all of his precious swords. All of them seemed to be there and not wreaked in anyway. Though his calender with elegant looking eagles soaring in the picture, was in a different place then he originally had it. Moving over to put it back in place, he noticed that this whole week he had something on the go but he could not remember ever filling it in. Taking a closer look Wufie discovered that he had a date with a girl every single night. Staring very hard at the calender now crumpled in his fist, he reached the only conclusion he could.

About five seconds later all through out the house "Duo! Omea o Karisue!" was heard being screamed by four different voices.

A/N: well what do you think? Yes I know it doesn't make any sense did it? Sorry, I was just trying to get it down so I could post it. Anyway R&R! Cya!


	6. Where's the Payback?

A/N: Wondering what happened to poor Duo? Still wondering who Heero's Girlfriend is? Well guess what? You get to find out!

Disclaimer: I do not, nor ever will, own Gundam Wing. I just own this story's idea and any character not in Gundam Wing.

Madness, Insanity, and Out of Control

Chapter 6 – Where's the Payback?

* * *

Duo wandered slowly up the steps towards the police station. The events of yesterday ran through his head. He still couldn't believe he had managed to end up with only a few bruises before a cop happened to see the commotion that was going on and arrested the other four boys. Ironically the other boys expected to be bailing Duo out of jail not the other way around. The only thing that was really worrying Duo was what the other boys were going to do as revenge.

As he arrived at the desk and paid the bail the other four were escorted to where Duo sat waiting. They had maniacal evil grins on their faces that were completely ignored by the officers. Duo shuddered involuntarily.

"I'm still surprised, Mr. Maxwell, that you came to bail them out and not file a restraining order against them. But I guess that's your business and not mine." Officer Joe something or other, told him as he signed the forms confirming he paid the bail and he was reliable for them. Before they left Joe left them with some insightful words. "Don't go causing any more trouble, and Heero you're already in trouble for the Relena incident. Don't go causing anymore or there will be no bail out next time."

Nods of understanding were seen as the boys left following Duo to the vehicle. Climbing in, there was silence. While they were driving, there was silence. As they got out of the car and walked up to the house there was silence. Duo was starting to feel very worried and a bit worried that the author was going to use silence in another sentence again.

As Duo closed the front door, The four other boys surrounded him with Zero System looks in their eyes. It was scary.

"Duo, If you ever do that again, we will ship you off to the Doctors for five weeks." Heero gave his best death glare yet. Duo was cowering under the intense evil glares being sent his way. "And remove all that pink!"

"Phone those Onna's and cancel all those dates."

"Tell me where the systems are and the codes to turn them all off." Trowa had left his emotional mask back at the station. Pure anger had overtaken his features.

"You can explain everything to my sisters, and remove all those posters from my room." Quatre had a full blown glare on and it wasn't cute and adorable in the slightest.

"O.. OK." Duo croaked out half scared and half surprised that this was all he was getting. The boys separated and Duo went to work undoing everything he had done. It wasn't until late that night that everything was set right again and the other boys started being friendly to him again.

Sitting outside in the warm night air, the boys were doing various things. Quatre and Trowa were just sitting on the steps gazing at the stars, Heero and Duo were busy talking about details of the last mission, and Wufie was on his back on the grass reading by the full moon.

"... So we retrieved the disc and now its up to you to deliver it to Preventer HQ. They said something about having a mission for you to do on your own." Heero finished.

"Did they say what the mission was?" Duo questioned.

"No. Just that someone by the name of Dilane asked for you specifically for the mission. Seems a bit suspicious if you ask me. No ones requested anyone of us specifically before."

"A bit suspicious, yes. I may as well check it out though. Maybe it will give us a lead on to who's been causing all the trouble lately." Duo responded quite unperturbed.

"Would you two keep it down? I'm trying to read." Wufie muttered from behind his book.

"Oh hey! That reminds me. Heero during the Relena incident, you said that you had a girlfriend." Duo mentioned curiously.

"Did I say that? You know I can't remember anything that happened that day."

"Yes you said that. So is it true?" Trowa, Quatre, and Wufie perked up at the question and stared quizzically at Heero.

"Yes. Her names, Amy." Heero answered while his face flushed a light red.

"Ohhhh where'd you meet her? What she look like? Tell us Heero!" Quatre quirked up.

"I was out buying groceries cause Duo ate all the food again, and I met her. She has brown hair, and the most gorgeous blue eyes ever, and she can kiss. Man can she ever kiss!" Heero started staring off into space completely ignoring the others who were staring at him like he had just let his guard down. Well actually he just had let his guard down.

Ten minutes later a silver convertible pulled up the driveway and a women shrouded in the dark got out. All the boys except Heero looked up at the stranger who was there so late at night. Knee length hair trailed after her as she floated gracefully over to the boys. Spotting Heero, she ignored the other boys and went over to him and kissed him on the top of his head. Tilting his head up, Heero responded by pulling her head down and kissing her deeply. The boys stared in shock at what 'The Perfect Soldier' was doing.

Five minutes later the two finally pulled apart and they became acutely aware of the others being there. Heero looked between the woman and his friends. Another four minutes passed before anything was said.

"This is Amy. Amy this is Quatre, Trowa, Wufie, and Duo." Heero said as he pointed to each of the stunned boys.

"A.. A pleasure" Quatre managed as the other boys nodded in acknowledgment.

A/N: Ooooo how far has Heero gone? I dunno actually. smirk Anyway hope you liked. Sort of a short chapter but at least it had some of that thing called plot. Ta!


	7. Party Pooper

A/N: It's been forever since I have updated this fic. Sorry about the delay. Now that summer's over my brain is starting to work again. Hopefully I will get around to posting more often. Thank you very much for all the reviews I have gotten so far. Anyway here's chapter seven.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing.

Madness, Insanity, and Out Of Control

Chapter 7 – Party Pooper

* * *

A few days after the prank disaster and the shock of Heero's girlfriend, we find our heroes lazing about in the coldest room in the safe house. Trowa and Quatre are sipping tea and having a quiet conversation in one corner of the room. Wufie is reading and sipping back cold water. Duo is sprawled out on the floor, in front of a fan, shirtless, with hair loose to flow out from behind his head. Heero is lying stretched out on the couch talking to his girlfriend like he had been for the last four hours. (Yes I know what I just said and I didn't go crazy)

". . . But baby, I don't want anything to do with her. . . Yes I realize it would be a great opportunity to get her to drop the lawsuit. . . What's that?. . . No! Baby don't break up with me!. . . Fine. I'll go. . . Of course I will bring the others. . . Okay. Love you Tenshi. Bye." Heero made a disgusted face as he hung up.

"What was that all about Heero?" Quatre asked looking over at the disturbed boy while he placed his tea cup on the table with a quiet clink.

"Yeah, and what are you dragging us to now?" Duo added questioningly.

"Relena's having her birthday party tonight and she asked Amy to tell us to come." Heero replied sullenly.

"That onna is pretty brave to invite you Heero." Wufie pointed out while he placed the book down to rest upon his knee.

"Whatever." Heero replied before getting up and heading out the door.

"What's eating him?" Duo asked everyone else in the room but they just shrugged in answer. With one last questioning glance at the door that Heero had disappeared through, Duo settled once more on the floor taking in the coolness of the fan.

Later that night the boys arrived at Relena's mansion dressed in their best suits. Quatre led the way up the stairway to the front door, the other's followed grumpily. Quatre rang the doorbell and waited. As the door opened, Relena sat there in a wheelchair smiling at the boys.

"Hello! So glad you could all make it!" The former Queen said with the air that what she said was well rehearsed. It probably was. "Please come in."

The boys shuffled past her nodding and muttering their thanks. Upon entering the ball room the boys split up. Quatre and Trowa went over to ask Dorothy and Cathy to dance. Wufie scowled and went to get himself something to eat. Duo said something about needing to liven the party up a little and headed off to where the large punch bowl was. Heero treaded slowly over to where his girlfriend was. Unfortunately that meant talking to Relena.

"Ah, there you are Heero darling." Amy said as he drew closer. Obediently Heero took his place beside her and gave her a small kiss but made sure Relena could see. Pulling away he glanced over and was pleased to see that Relena had a jealousy written all over her face.

"So what was it you were saying, Amy?" Relena asked trying to bring attention back to the conversation he had obviously just interrupted.

"Oh yes. Well I was thinking that you could maybe help me out a bit. I'm trying to get this dress made and I can't find anyone who has the time or the expertise to make it." Amy replied in a somewhat annoyed voice.

"Would you ladies like something to drink?" Heero interrupted just as Relena was about to respond.

"Yes, please." Relena answered courtly.

"Amy?" Heero said turning to his girlfriend.

"No. That's alright Heero. I'll get some later. Thank-you." Amy replied sophisticatedly. Heero nodded in acknowledgment and left the girls.

"Seems like Heero's having fun, eh Wuffers?" Duo commented to the less then thrilled Wufie.

"He looks miserable and stop calling me Wuffers or you'll lose your braid!" Wufie threatened. Duo just grabbed his braid protectively.

"You're just jealous that your hair isn't as beautiful as mine." Duo said then stuck out his tongue.

"Stop being so immature." Heero said popping out of nowhere causing the two bickering boys to jump. "Listen Duo. I need a favor."

"Heero needing a favor from me? This is different. Sure, I'll bite. What you need?" Duo asked.

"I know you brought some alcohol with you to spike the punch. I'm wondering if you have any left that I can have." Heero pleaded. Wufie stood there shocked and Duo looked at Heero like he had lost his marbles.

"I already spiked the punch." Duo stated.

"I know. But do you have any left?" Heero pleaded again. "It's for Relena. . . only she doesn't know it yet."

"Here." Duo said shocked at what Heero was doing. Duo reached into his suit jacket and pulled out a bottle half full.

"Thanks." Heero said taking it and moving over to the punch bowl.

The night passed quickly and the crazy level rose as the night progressed all thanks to Duo and his magic bottle of alcohol. Though Relena was a little more then tipsy by the time her speech came.

"Hello (hic) ladies and gentle. . . gentlemen. I, (hic) Relena, (hic) am celebrating my nineteenth (hic) birthday. I (hic) am oh so happy (hic) for the lovely gift of flying purple flamingo's. He he he he. I would also like (hic) to make mention that (hic) I am drunk. I would also (hic) also like to mention that (hic) I think boys are yucky insensitive jerks named Heero. And I'm now (hic) going to fall over." Relena concurred while giggling before passing out and falling into the arms of her brother.

"Well. . . uhhhh. . . umm. . . Thank you for coming." Zechs stuttered not quite sure what to say or make of the situation. There were important people all over the ball room doing anything but being civilized. "I would now like to ask you all to go home."

Slowly the drunk guests left leaving three very drunk pilots and one very sober pilot alone in the ball room talking to Zechs.

"Where exactly did Heero get too?" Zechs asked the sober Wufie.

"No idea. He was with Amy last time I check. . . Oh." Wufie fell silent as he realized where Heero had gone. "Right. Well. I'll be taking these three home. Night Zechs."

"Good night." Zechs answered as he helped Wufie the drunk guys into the vehicle they had come in.

When the boys arrived home they all went to their own rooms. . . or almost all of them made it to their rooms. Duo collapsed halfway up the stairs causing Wufie to trip and curse all the way down the stairs. Deciding it was safer, he just went and slept on the couch.

A/N: Yay! I finished writing this chapter! I'm sorry it took so long to update. Anyway hope to get chapter 8 up soon. Ja ne!


	8. No Order in the Court Part 1

A/N: Hey long time no post, eh? Sorry bout that. My muses ran away as well I've been busy with school and I just got a job as well. Please put up with my horrible posting habits and enjoy the chapter. Anyway enjoy the chappy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing.

Madness, Insanity, and Out of Control  
Chapter 8: No Order in the Court Part 1

* * *

Early the next morning, Heero walked in the front door in a daze. He couldn't remember anything that had happened at the party. Only what had happened after the party at Amy's house, and what a time that had been. A smile crept up onto his face as he remembered. 

The sound of the phone ringing in the kitchen brought Heero back to reality. Wincing at the pain in his head the ring was causing, he dragged himself to the kitchen and picked up the phone.

"Hello... Speaking... You do realize how early it is... what was that... So what your saying is that there is absolutely no possible way for me to get out of this and even pleading insanity won't work... No, but... What do you mean you want a raise in payment? . . . What do you mean no one else wants this case because their scared of me? . . . Fine. You're fired! I'll do this myself... I don't need luck." Heero slammed the phone down on the receiver. "Quatre! Help!"

A few moments later a very out of breath Quatre walked into the kitchen. His hair was a mess and his shirt was unbuttoned. "What do you need, Heero?"

Heero blinked. "Where were you?"

"In the other room with Trowa playing cards. But I'm guessing that's not what you called me in here to ask." Quatre replied casually completely missing the look Heero was giving him.

"Uh right. Um Quatre I need your help. I sort of, kind of, umm . . . fired my lawyer in a fit of rage. Oh and apparently none of the other lawyers want my case at all . . . because they are sort of scared of me." Heero muttered then fell on his knees and groveled (yes I just said Heero groveled. What can I say? He's desperate.) "Please, please, please! You've got to help me!"

Quatre shifted nervously from foot to foot. Heero was acting very weird. No more then very weird . . . more like weird to the max and it scared Quatre to no end. Taking a quick scan of how far he was to the nearest exit, Quatre glanced back down at Heero. "Before I help you at all, please stop begging. It's scary."

"Right sorry." Heero responding as he stood up and faced Quatre a little more professionally.

"Now as for your problem I'll see what I can do. If I can't find anyone to take the case, then," Quatre paused and thought about what he was about to offer. Figuring it to be the only other option Quatre continued. "I will defend you in court. That is if it will be allowed considering I was there during the incident."

"Thank you Quatre!" Heero squealed. (Oi . . . I'm turning Heero into a girly boy. He's gonna kill me later either that or the Heero fangirls will...) Heero then happily bounded out of the room leaving Quatre to wonder in dismay at Heero's sanity.

"I just hope I didn't make a bad decision..." Quatre thought before returning to the other room to continue playing cards with Trowa.

----Court Day----

"Oh ya I made a bad decision." Quatre thought to himself as he and the others took their place in the court room. In the past few weeks Heero had gone from being the perfect soldier to being . . . well for lack of a better word. . . normal. Everyone in the safe house had tried to stay as far away from the deranged pilot as humanly possible, which proved futile. "At least I found a new lawyer for him. That's the only good thing. I just hope he comes back to his senses soon or the case is lost."

Quatre glanced down to where Duo, Trowa, and Wufei were leading Heero to the defendant's table. After assuring the lawyer Heero wasn't going to harm anything and after the lawyer moved his chair away from Heero by several inches, the judge came out and the court session began.

First to testify were a few witnesses that were at the beach with Relena. Then Wufei was up.

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?"

"Do I believe in justice?" Wufei replied.

"Uh. . ."

"Yes."

"Right well then. State your name for the records."

"Chang Wufei." Wufei stated.

"Wufei you were present at the time of the incident is that correct?"

"Yes I was."

"In your own words explain what happened."

"Well it started when Relena broke into the house and found Heero. I was sitting in the tea room with Quatre and Trowa. We heard yelling and a gunshot. When we arrived at the scene Duo sat dumbfounded and Heero was out his mind. Trowa led Duo upstairs to his room after the three of us had tied Heero to a chair, took away his gun, and interrogated Duo. When Quatre and I were trying to decide what to do next Heero broke free of the chair and tried to make an escape. In the attempt he knocked over most of the furniture and gave me and Quatre several bruises and cuts. Finally he fled out the door and I gave chase with Quatre behind me.

When Heero arrived at the beach he immediately spotted Relena's pink chair, pink umbrella, pink towel, her very ugly pink bikini, and I think you get the point. Now not being in his right mind he became more violent." Wufei finished and took a deep breath.

The judge blinked. "Relena broke into your house? Sweet little angel Relena? We are talking about the Vice-Foreign Minister Relena right?"

"What rock have you been living under? She is no angel and never was. You are un-just if you cannot see that she is a bitch." Wufei protested.

The court took in a large intake of breath at the accusations against Relena. Relena looked pleased with herself for a second then changed to a look of outrage.

"Yes umm I think that is quite enough. Wufei please step down while I take this all in. There will be a half hour recess." The judge said before stepping off the podium thing and almost ran into the door in his rush to leave the court room.

* * *

A/N: Wow lots happened. And I am having tons of fun tormenting Heero. I would like to note that I am almost done this fic. There will only be a few more chapters. Then I may write a sequel if readers would really like me to. Laters! 


End file.
